As J Mase III asks (around the 11-minute mark), what are some “goodies” that you get for being polite and nice in the face of bias, discrimination, trauma, etc.? 
Try to list at least 2 examples of “goodies” that you or others have received or experienced in exchange for niceness/politeness.
Are these “goodies” any “good”? Who benefits from these “goodies”? Write a few sentences sharing your thoughts.

WhatComingOutasTransTaughtMeAboutIslamophobia_JMaseIII_TEDxLosGatos-TheGoodMenProject.pdf

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6/8/22, 1:28 AM What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos – The Good Men Project
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Home / Featured Content / What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos
What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos Are you enabling social injustice without knowing it?
June 29, 2019 by J Mase III Leave a Comment
— Are you enabling social injustice without knowing it? J Mase III discusses steps to effect real change for social justice—steps that can save lives. J Mase III is a Black/trans/queer poet & educator based in Seattle by way of Philly. As an educator, Mase has worked with community members in the US, UK, and Canada on the needs of LGBTQIA folks in spaces such as K-12 schools, universities, faith communities and restricted care facilities.He is founder of awQward, the ?rst trans and queer people of color talent agency.
His work has been featured on MSNBC, Essence Live, Everyday Feminism, Black Girl Dangerous, the New York Times, Buzzfeed, the Root, theGrio, the Huf?ngton Post and more. —
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6/8/22, 1:28 AM What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos – The Good Men Project
https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/what-coming-out-as-trans-taught-me-about-islamophobia-j-mase-iii-tedxlosgatos/ 2/36
What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About IslamophobiaWhat Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia……
—
Transcript provided by YouTube:  
00:08 [Music] 00:11 so imagine you’re going into a store and 00:14 when you’re going into the store you see 00:16 a store clerk and a security guard and 00:18 when you see them one of them doesn’t 00:21 matter which but one of them says hello 00:23 to you and when they say hello to you it 00:25 comes out sort of like this like hey 00:27 hello is that someone generally trying 00:31 to seem friendly yes yeah 00:35 Shares202
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6/8/22, 1:28 AM What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos – The Good Men Project
https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/what-coming-out-as-trans-taught-me-about-islamophobia-j-mase-iii-tedxlosgatos/ 3/36
some of y’all a little skeptical I like 00:36 that you better forget let’s say you go 00:39 into the story different day and so on 00:41 this day again you go in you see a store 00:44 clerk and a security guard and one of 00:46 them says hello to you only this time 00:48 when they say hello it comes out sort of 00:49 like this hello is that someone trying 00:55 to seem friendly no right so what I’m 00:58 hoping we can get from this exercise is 01:00 that simple polite gestures like Hello 01:02 don’t always equal friendly can we agree 01:04 on that and we’ve all been in a moment 01:07 or experience in which what someone said 01:09 was different than what was being 01:11 communicated does that make sense to 01:12 everyone so when I think about myself as 01:15 a trans person I’ve been out and as an 01:17 adult longer than I’ve been in the 01:19 closet right I also spent a lot of my 01:21 Shares202
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6/8/22, 1:28 AM What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos – The Good Men Project
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time talking about identity and talking 01:23 about trans miss and I usually express 01:27 myself in a way that’s outside typical 01:28 gender norms so people are generally 01:30 rarely surprised to hear me say that I’m 01:33 trans even if they don’t quite have the 01:34 language for it does that make sense and 01:36 so that’s not surprising but what does 01:40 become surprising for folks is when I 01:42 say that I grew up in a multi-faith 01:43 household in particular that I have a 01:46 father who was raised Muslim and a 01:48 mother who was raised Christian now when 01:50 I say that people who perceive 01:52 themselves as being in solidarity with 01:54 the part of me that is trans immediately 01:56 want to focus in on my father and they 01:59 weren’t enough well what did your father 02:01 think about you coming out and when 02:04 folks asked me this question a few 02:05 Shares202
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6/8/22, 1:28 AM What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos – The Good Men Project
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things kind of come up so one it’s clear 02:08 that they don’t think it’s important to 02:09 unpack the relationship I had with my 02:11 non-muslim parent so I noticed that I 02:14 noticed the places in which they want me 02:16 to accept or reject whatever notions 02:19 they have about who Muslim people are 02:22 here the places where they’re not 02:23 actually concerned about the real 02:24 relationship I had with my father 02:25 they’re not concerned about the standing 02:29 breakfast date we had every Saturday 02:30 morning and we would spend 30 days 02:32 arguing about who got to pay he got to 02:34 pay that day that’s why he looks so 02:35 happy they’re not concerned about the 02:38 fact that he was my best friend and the 02:40 person I spent the most time talking 02:42 about my faith and spiritual journey 02:43 with they don’t care about the old chain 02:46 Shares202
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6/8/22, 1:28 AM What Coming Out as Trans Taught Me About Islamophobia | J Mase III | TEDxLosGatos – The Good Men Project
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of his that I wear around my neck with 02:48 his name on it nah 02:49 they want to hear a critique how do I 02:51 know they want to hear a critique 02:53 because when I follow up their question 02:55 with wonderful stories about the 02:57 relationship between my father and I 02:58 after coming out they are always in 03:01 shock but when they’re asking this 03:04 question they’re very polite about it so 03:06 should I accept the Islamophobia 03:08 projected onto my family and my family 03:10 dynamics simply because the asker is 03:12 polite about it so just based off the 03:16 title I know for some of y’all you might 03:18 have been expecting that this was going 03:19 to be a coming-out story well surprise 03:21 I’ve been out for a long time and so I’m 03:24 not invested in dissecting that part of 03:26 my journey with you what I do want to 03:28 Shares202
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